Friday, September 10, 2010

Literally Frazzled (Pun intended)

I always hate not knowing what type of mood Im in. Its a dreary Friday and we are leaving for memphis in a few hours. Everything feels the same but different. Campus is strange now, mostly because of the Freshman and other newcomers. But its more than just the unfamiliar faces.

Its me.
Im different now.

I think about different things and I have new desires. It is all so unsettling. Im just working now to close this chapter of my life. And although I may not know exactly what I want my life to be, I know this is only seasonal. So its fun, and its nice seeing friends but its all so superficial. I want something deeper. I strive to know something greater.

But you know what I wonder? When all the pieces are put together like i think they should be and i have myself "together" then what? What comes after togetherness?

Do we get ourselves together just to fall apart again? Lol, its laughable. So when I get the apartment, the car, the degree, and even the husband (as blasphemous as it may sound) what say you then life?????????

WHATS AFTER THAT?????

Another degree, car, house, another husband (lol, as blasphemous as it is two fold!) No but really. Im curious. I guess Ill just start with the now, and try to get through this literary criticism. Im pretty good at sounding like I know what Im talking about but this English stuff at its core is on an entirely different level. And im sure I can do it, I just have to sit down and do it. I strive to be the best at what I do, whatever it is that I do, and most come easy. But this is gonna take some work.